You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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