Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
