There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
