lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
