It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
sarcasm needs its own font
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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