i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Drunk is not a location!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize