I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
just tell him i said nine months
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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