Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
