i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I know her cup size but not her name....
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
