when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Randomize
