It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
