i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
