Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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