All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
