You're my little dorito
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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