If that was your dad, he is hot
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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