So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
