your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.