In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
