They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize
