EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
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