Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
