Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
