??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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