I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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