did you get engaged???
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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