Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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