White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
