If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
