Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Randomize