speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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