Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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