i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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