If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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