As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You made out with two different species that night
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
