Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
