I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
