i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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