I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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