When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
