How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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