WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
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This is John, I met you downtown last night.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.