glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
