You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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