let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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