singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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