make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
