She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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