i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
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If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
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I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations