We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize