Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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